February 2010
9 posts
Oblivion
I don’t think pandemics make us afraid of death, I think they make us afraid of oblivion. They force us to grapple with the futility of effort. Also they make us barf which isn’t fun either… Wash your hands, cover your coughs, and find a way to hold in balance the futility of effort with the necessity to struggle.
After doing shrooms, it feels like the volume’s been turned down on everything.
“So much of what is best in us is bound up in our love of family, that it remains...”
– Haniel Long
“And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”
– Friedrich Nietzsche
“You don’t really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a...”
– William Tammeus
“Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast...”
– Terry Pratchett
“Fairy tales do not tell children that dragons exist. Children already know that...”
– G.K. Chesterton
“Wild animals never kill for sport. Man is the only one to whom the torture and...”
– James Anthony Froud
“Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one who...”
– Mark Twain
December 2009
4 posts
“What is he trying to escape: the world or the end of it?”
i hate twitter
i have no place to vent my random thoughts, my needs, etc. twitter is no fun when all my brothers and sisters have my updates attached to their phone. i cant even send in a tweet without five phones going off around me right after. i just want a reprieve, where passersby, procrastinators, idlers, anyone can sift through their tweets, read mine, maybe think about it and move on. i hate having...
November 2009
3 posts
Why is Christianity an insult to mankind? 1) Why would a sentient being say “Believe in me or else?” You believe in God and then…dont go to hell? What does that accomplish? You don’t even have to be nice. You just have to believe and you get to drink wine in the clouds for eternity!!
You tell me to go away, you want me to come back. I talk to you too much, but now you won’t leave me alone, and if I do say a few words, you treat me like shit, like scum, like a big pain you have to deal with. And the fact of the matter is, that I don’t even care. It doesn’t bother me when you treat me this way, how you must think of me, how you act towards me. It doesn’t...
Things I like:
Sometimes I chuckle at the silly things that I enjoy. I’d like to write them all down somewhere.
1. Ecclesiastical courts and law circa early sixteenth century (England)
2. South American archaeology
3. Demonology
4. Historical Christianity
5. Anything and everything Tudor, Lancastrian, York, and Stuart from Matilda to James I
6. Imagining scenarios to music
7. Making lists
8. Being...
July 2009
7 posts
Music isn’t about twitter or followers, tumblr, facebook, stickam chats, myspace adds, or any of your other bullshits. Nobody cares about what you care about and nobody cares about you. Music is an individual endeavour both in performance and in appreciation. Respect it as it is, or it won’t be around for you to enjoy it.
Don't tell me that I'm ordinary
If you count me at all.
“According to Greek mythology, humans were originally created with 4 arms, 4 legs...”
I admit I'm still watching the days go by.
It feels like all a dream, like I can’t even hang onto the memories clear enough now that I’m home and you’re not here. I’m going to try to think of all the sweet things you said tonight as I try to fall asleep, but I know it will only make me miss you more. I’ll be colder tonight. I already miss the smell of you in the air. I miss your raspy voice. I miss your lips...
And then we fall into place
Sid: You're perfect
Me: What? Why? ....You're perfect
Sid: I'm not perfect, you're perfect enough
Me: Why?
Sid: Because you seem so innocent, but you're everything I would want you to be
Me: I want to give you everything you want
Sid: I want to give you everything
“Have faith in me. There are things that I’ve seen I don’t believe....”
– A Day To Remember
Fuck off.
Yeah I’m always drunk and I’m loud and I’m crude. I like to talk about having sex with my boyfriend and mouth off about music and stupid people. I flirt and I’m shameless and I don’t listen to you because no one controls me but me. I fuckin’ do what I want.
June 2009
17 posts
oh yeah? yeah.
Wanna know what your life would be like if you didn’t obsess about bands and people and things in general? It would be wonderful and you’d be an individual, you wouldn’t be tethered to something that isn’t real. You’d have your own views and dreams and likes and ideals that don’t stem or connect back to your obsessions. Of course you’ll never believe that...
What a world.
I do believe in a higher power. I just don’t know what that power may be.
“I’ll be honest about it. It is not atheists who get stuck in my craw, but...”
– Life of Pi
978) The people I talk to online know me better...
(via truthbox)
I love you and our toothbrush superhero pets.
969) When you tell me that I'm pretty, I say...
(via truthbox)
And sometimes I laugh when I see her because I can’t believe how well you’ve done by catching me. That makes me a shitty person but I think you should be appreciative of me because everyone knows I’m 25xs hotter than you.
And then I go to hell.
http://creationdawn.tumblr.com/post/129846145/hopeandmusic
Respawn
I don’t understand. Michael Jackson didn’t just ‘molest some kids.’ Technically no one will EVER know if he actually did. If Michael Jackson didn’t exist NEITHER WOULD POP MUSIC. R& B wouldn’t exist and neither would HIP HOP.
All Time Low, The Maine, Cobra, Blink, Recover, TREOS, all these poppy bands wouldn’t have come around if Michael Jackson...
Apathy.
I wish I could sleep just so I wouldn’t have to be conscious to my thoughts.
“I don’t need you to find resolve.”
– There For Tomorrow
How to spot a floozy at the graduation: lady name, men start hooping and hollering. Fun for the whole family.
http://twitter.com/jesijayy
Little Mona Lisa told a lie.
Do you want me?
Do you want to let me know that you’re okay?
May 2009
10 posts
The art of misery.
24 hours just ain’t enough for me.
Mike Mike Mike
“You’re such a d-bag” Tessa whined, flopping over onto the couch. I saw his arm move out of the way, and I snarled. There he was. The new me. The new Mike. Tessa’s boyfriend. The boyfriend after me. I’d broken up with her and then nine months later I find her with this low-life. Talk about a mid-life crisis. Shouldn’t there be a one year minimum to how long it...
Emptiness brings no solace
Welcome to Oblivion.
I’m excruciatingly unhappy.
“To mortals’ common fate thy mind resign;
My lot today tomorrow may be...”
“Yeah you bleed just to know you’re alive.”
– Goo Goo Dolls
Cold as ice
I just reread all my conversations with Mike, not like….recent ones, I mean, ones we had about two years ago. Really painful ones, ones where, when I was having them, I’m pretty sure I was so miserable I couldn’t function properly. I remember crying uncontrollably. I remember wanting to die. I remember never having been that miserable in my entire life. I also remember that even...
So cute
My boyfriend is adorable. Even though he’s kind of a dork, oblivious, and doesn’t really know what he’s doing….ever.